Analyzing our collective obsession with videos of hydraulic presses

It may be a sunny Friday afternoon, but I've experienced what I described to a friend, without a hint of irony (or perspective), as a “cursed day.” After all my usual coping mechanisms failed, I found myself staring helplessly at the blank page that bore the day's theme. should until a stinging sensation made my eyes glaze over. Are those… tears, I wondered? I've been in therapy long enough to know that I'm not feeling this way because of writer's block.

I know only too well that something else is at play, so I try – within the deadline – to do the right thing and take a mental break. I give myself 20 minutes, set my alarm, lie down on the sofa and wait for serenity to wash over me. After seven minutes, I realise I'm not on the road to calm, so I reach for my phone. Surely social media will be a source of relief, I wonder, losing touch with reality. The universe throws me a bone. Or rather, a video of jelly beans being squashed under a shiny hydraulic press. Next up is a compilation of macaroons, Pringles and Wotsits being flattened. The caption reads: “Colourful squishy fun” and the video has been viewed 749,205 times. 749,206 times, I think, and press replay.