Dodgers relief player talks about his broken hand off the field

When the Los Angeles Dodgers announced that Anthony Banda was placed on the injured list due to a hairline fracture in his hand, many wondered how this could have happened.

Was it during a game?

Manager Dave Roberts said Banda hit a “solid object” with his throwing hand out of frustration after allowing two runs in a Sept. 9 game against the Cubs.

“It was very embarrassing, very shameful,” Banda told Mike DiGiovanna of the Los Angeles Times. “I really felt like I had let everyone down.”

Banda, who was acquired from the Cleveland Guardians in mid-May, had established himself in a major role with a 2-2 record and a 3.23 ERA in 46 games before landing on the 15-day injured list.

He clarified that the injury was not caused by a blow.

“I didn't hit anything,” Banda said. “In frustration, I hit a paper towel dispenser with the outside of my fist and apparently hit the weakest bone, which broke.”

“I'm not saying it's OK, but it's not as bad as people thought when I hit something directly. I don't do that to anything because it's a risk. I look at it more as a freak accident, but yeah, it was a learning experience.”

Banda is scheduled to participate in live batting practice on Monday, and Roberts expects him to be activated from the injured list on Wednesday or Thursday if he is eligible.

“The most frustrating thing is that I didn't have any pain or soreness the whole time, just swelling in my hand,” Banda said. “But the fact that it's responded well and I haven't lost the ability to turn my throws or generate any speed is a huge plus. It was a big scare, but at the end of the day when I get back to action, I want to put it behind me and do whatever I can to help this team.”

As part of his recovery, Banda began to connect with his teammates in the bullpen.

“They understand it's frustrating and emotional,” Banda said. “They obviously weren't happy about the outcome, but they were supportive. They were supportive. A lot of them were texting me all week on the road trip, asking how I was doing. That alone says a lot. I know they really want me back.”

The 31-year-old also sees the incident as a learning opportunity.

“It's a very competitive game and this won't be the last time I lose it, but I have to understand that the consequences are real and that anything can happen in those weak moments and that these things will potentially haunt me for the rest of my career.

“I'm human, I make mistakes, and this was a costly one. I'm not looking for pity – this was my fault, and I owned up to it. We all do stupid things, and I hate to think I did that to myself, but as long as we learn from it, we can move on.”