Dear Annie, I can’t believe how much I get done when I put my phone away

Updated: 27 seconds ago Published: 27 seconds ago

This column was first published in 2021.

Dear Annie: I decided to put my phone away for a while and the results were wonderful.

Today was the day I was allowed to pick up the phone again. I had imposed a three-day restriction on myself and today was the fourth day. During those three days, I only answered my father's calls. He is 86 and I don't want to miss a minute of his time with us. But that was all I allowed myself.

I can't believe how much I've accomplished in my small apartment. Everything is shiny and tidy again.

I will follow this rule weekly. I think this is the best idea I've ever had and it's nice to see that others have come to the same conclusion.

There's a great movie waiting for me, so I put the phone away to enjoy my time.

— Feel free again

Dear, feel free again: When we say no to certain behaviors, we say yes and open the door to other positive behaviors. Thank you for sharing your experience with us.

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Dear Annie: When my children were young, I was in an abusive, controlling marriage and couldn't leave until they made their own lives. After 37 years, I finally got out of that marriage, thank God!

Although I have found a way out, my problem is how best to move on – to create my own life away from him. Sometimes I feel lonely and scared, and sometimes I wonder if I can make it on my own.

I know he made me feel like I couldn't do anything for myself and he destroyed so many relationships in my life. He turned so many people against me. He did that by lying and by making people believe him.

I finally realized that he was a narcissist who was very cunning and always made a fool of me. Please try to give me support and advice so that I don't let this person make a fool of me with his lies anymore. Thank you.

— Married to a narcissist

Dear married couple: Congratulations on moving on from what was a terrible situation for you. There are support groups you can join that will help you recover from the abuse you suffered at the hands of your husband. Check out https://narcissistabusesupport.com/narcissist-abuse-support-groups/.

The best part is that you're away from his toxicity, which can only leave you drained and drained. It's time to rebuild the parts of your self-esteem that he spent years destroying. Get other people, like a good therapist or members of a support group, to help you restore those parts.

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Dear Annie: I just want to say this. I am a 63-year-old woman. I was bullied at school for no reason at all. I was never the type to fight back or say anything and after all these years it still bothers me. I was afraid to tell my parents what I went through. I taught my children to come to me if they are ever treated like that at school. Please, dear parents, question your children; ask them if everything is OK at school. Bullying is not right at any age!

— Still have scars

Dear Scars: I'm sorry you had to experience bullying. You're right, the scars remain. I hope that with the help of a good therapist, you can heal some of the hurt from the past so you can be pain free.